Must I Signature On My Death Certifites ...

Hmmmm, i felt a lost , how came i must leave my home Iraq within tow weeks, oh God i dont wanna leave my sky , my stars , my heart , my soul , my love ,my poeple , my land which hold not only my physicaly as a body but everything is me and mine , God make that day never ever come , God make my last day eariler than leaving Iraq day comes, i lost almost my five senses, i didnt feel hunger or thirsty, i was sitting around table on meals time just because my parents asked for, i was eating without any feeling or a disire .. I didnt believe that within few days i wont breath Iraq air , wont see Iraq sun light. Ah almost i was dead , what a bitter life, i cant believe it, tomorrow i will say GOODBYE MY HOME, GOODBYE MY LIFE, GOODBYE IRAQ, isnt it ?AHHHH i was distroyed... Its morning now, Sarah ,Sarah wake up, come have your breakfast and be ready on 1 pm a texi would be here to take us . . My God am i on a nightmare or a wake ? Ahhhh unfortunaly am a wake.. I strated sms_ing and phoning my friends for say Goodbye, God n0w its 1 pm .. Texi didnt come on time, hehe i wish wont come. hmmm, my house was full of relatives, friends and neihbours ,most were sad ,crying and wish a good luck for us ,its bitter momments, while i was still shocked.. 15 mins. later the TEXI was at my home step,, i disapeared inside the CAR WHICH WILL DRIVE ME DEATH,, it was very long way, i experinced one thousands mixture of feelings, very hard years of momments, i felt very cold even it was actually hot weather, a mid of summer season, i was gazing through the car window , eating every sight of iraq by my eyes while my tears were sheding from the heart bottom , i was breathing deeply as a fish is going out of see, i dont know what happend sudenly i felt very hungry ,i felt as if i didnt eat for a century , i had 5 or 6 sandwitch of chicken ,i was very thristy too i drank 5 bottels of paspi before i reached iraqi borders, i got out of car at iraq check point, my papers and everything were officaly and okay, get into your car, now you can go ahead . 15 mins later i was out iraq with my family ........

I Want To Live My Childhood again

At Iraq We Born men and women . . I born a woman ,, I didnt live my childhood as every child in my land , I didnt get a doll , i wished ever to hug it and sleep .. I woke up on sounds of bombs , kill and losses. My father hardly i found him when i need to be in my side, he was a vistor attending home at off from his militarly duty , he was a soldier holding in his hand a gun and in his heart a killing love for land and for us . . While my mother wasnt only mother but father also .. On 1990, year of war, fear, tears, sucrifice and hard momments,, it was a cloudy morning, i had my breakfast and got ready to walk out to my school, i was 7years old as it was my 1st days at school, my mama sent me with my next door girls.. Before we reached school a clashes occured and guns bullets speared at everywhere around us,, that momment i blust into cry as well as did my friends, we run away in our way back home, view of blood, sounds of bullets , sounds of our screams and crying were surrendering me, i felt as im not a child anymore, i didnt stop crying but something inside me woke up , made me know whats war , whats fear and how much life is tough and hard , i closed my eyes and my ears for everything i run to my home , yeah, i reached home, my mama was waiting me and scare was on her eyes , she hugged me and we inter together to our home, i left my home a child and return it a woman ! . . .

Up But Down

these days passed on with more down without up ,,, tears full my eyes up ,, sadness tears my heart up ,, i shut my doors up ,,, i pray for and rise my hands for God up ,, i cant forget who was churr me up ,, i cant forget who left me down nor up ,, i cant shut my windows up either i cant rise my curtains up ,, beautiful memorial full my darkness up, i lost in deep sadness i cant rise up ,, my tears roled on my checks i cant break my burden up ,, my life turn down side up ,, my dreams run away before my eyes i cant catch it up ,,‏ ‏everything is going with me is about down nor up

I Have Right to Dream . .

As a butterfly flys then flys for a long time to drope its own pair of wings on a beautiful flower to steal a rest ,,, i was flying and flying in my own kingdom , i've sit under an old tree's shadow to give to my space a rest... A pair of birds fall down on an oasis to full thier thirest. I droped my back side by side with that kind tree to have a rest as i droped all my dreams in hopes ocean to come ture within mintues, i lost at an ocean of vesions,, i saw every thing nice,, angels fly at every place,, every spot was full of spirit, beauty of nature, blue and pure sky gave to my soul a sprit to go with spell world, i saw angels comming toward me with a magic quitar and started playing a holy music with a pleasure, i was lonely there, no earthy creatures there, silent was only what i Could not break, i heared air movment move on ,here all that gave me a dizzy, i needed you to be by side, my tears roled on my checks, i missed you to be with me as past ,i was so tired to think why you are so far as a star at dark sky, I fall a sleep for some time,, i lost for some time,oh yeah i've lost, It was an amazing night, we were side by side, you have hugged me so tight, we danced and danced under moon light, you've told me what i ever want to hear, my heart was dancing in my ribe, i was flying for a while and dancing for a while, i forget my burden for a while, we were toghter for some time, that time i was as butterfly ,, you've caught my heart between your hands ,,yeah that is my love,, sorry i woke up, why i woke up ? i couldnt see you here,, sorry all that was a dream, our meet was just a dream,,how much i did hope that dream never ever have an end ! Yeah i did

I Have Right to Dream . .

As a butterfly flys then flys for a long time to drope its own pair of wings on a beautiful flower to steal a rest ,,, i was flying and flying in my own kingdom , i've sit under an old tree's shadow to give to my space a rest... A pair of birds fall down on an oasis to full thier thirest. I droped my back side by side with that kind tree to have a rest as i droped all my dreams in hopes ocean to come ture within mintues, i lost at an ocean of vesions,, i saw every thing nice,, angels fly at every place,, every spot was full of sprit, beauty of nature, blue and pure sky gave to my soul a sprit to go with spell world, i saw angels comming toward me with a magic quitar and started playing a holy music with a pleasure, i was lonely there, no earthy creatures there, silent was only what i Could not break, i heared air movment move on ,here all that give me a dizzy, i needed you to be by side, my tears roled on my checks, i missed you to be with me as past ,i was so tired to think why you are so far as a star at dark sky, I fall a sleep for some time,, i lost for some time,oh yeah i've lost, It was an amazing night, we were side by side, you have hugged me so tight, we danced and danced under moon light, you've told me what i ever want to hear, my heart was dancing in my ribe, i was flying for a while and dancing for a while, i forget my burden for a while, we were toghter for some time, that time i was as butterfly ,, you've caught my heart between you hands ,,yeah that is my love,, sorry i woke up, why i worke up ? i couldnt see you here,, sorry all that was a dream, our meet was just a dream,,how much i did hope that dream never ever have an end ! Yeah i do

Phases Of Love

When i was a child, i drawn an angel's wish in my small mind, to dresse with a white wedding dress and walk by ,, but i was just a child dose not understand why like to dress in white ... I was a child an my heart was pure as white and nothing was in my mind just to dress in white ,, day by day my wish fade by .. i found my own self grow up and playing with my dolls was not feeding my new mind,,, im seven years now and walking to school became my another world,, i passed year by year and blessed my parents,, with every year passed by i was grow up and also my mind ,, when i became 12, child inside me started to mild ,, now im not child but i wished to buy pets, dolls and play with kids and miss to be a child ... When i became eighteen my chidhood wish started grow in my heart not only in mind ,, and dress with white didnt mean to me same as when i was a child ,,, i drawn your visage in my heart not only my mind , i searched for you around and at my books' lines useless i could find,,, now im tweenty_one but love didnt visit my world ,, i fed up but who came ? Oh my God my heart is beating in my ribe so wild,, is it love? Or just a thristy dream visit my heart, my soul and my mind,, is it you who was drawn in my small mind ? Is it you who grow up with me all these years since i was a child.. Is you who created by My God to be my soul mate , my love , my everything in my small world ? First time my eyes met yours i believed that you would be walk by .we pass by. my dream come true when with I love you ,,, Oh i love also to dress in white

IM HAPPY WITHOUT YOU ,, IM GOOD ,, with you and withouT YOU ,, IM GOoD ,,

Our meeting was as a blank in my past ,, you took one year from my TIME ! Oh yeah i found a big baby in your eyes ,, i found in you what i always loved to have ,, you was about to figure out what in my side ,, you have figured out inside me that everlasting baby who try to come out ,, we were perfect to bring our love to this earthy life ,, our dream was to test true love from its widest angles ,, No doubt at Once I believed blindly that you would not be mine and our love would be a baby step toward change love spaces hopelessly ,, i believed that our love will kill us without leaving any mercy on our heartheats .. Oh Yeah You was mine all the time ,, you was guarding me all my time ,, i was for you your everything ,, i was for you what droped you back to life ,, i was for you the ONE you ever dream to meet ,, even all that I was knowing that our love would nOT BRING TO THIS LIFE WHAT OUR HEARTS LOOKED ARGENTLY FOR ,, I WAS BELIEVING OUR LOVE WILL LEAVE TEARs On our eyes and crying for moOn would be HelpLesS .. I didnt believe you .. Yeah I didnt believe your love Thats what saved my heart , yeah thats what made me save myself from say Love Words ,,, I SAVED MYSLELF WELL AT ONCE ,, I WAS READY WELL FOR the momment OF say GOOD BYE to CoME ,, your LOVE WORDS WERE a nightmare visited OUR visions for MANY Nights and Months ,, its was SO kindly to wake up EARLY AND TO FIND OURSELVES SEPARTED BY EARTHY DISTANCE which circled us ,, I CANT BE YOURS AS YOU CANT BE MINE THATS OUR FATE ! I accepeted ALL THAT as you recently did ,, i cant say i was mistake in your life but i can say i mistaked when i believed that you may be can be my ONE ,,, this momment came ,, GOOD BYE FROM MY LIFE FOREVER ,, GOOD BY IM GOOD ,, IM JUST AS I WAS THe GIRL who WOULD NOT FALL HELPLESSLY ,,,, IM the ONE WHO WOULD ALWAYS BE SURVISED !! YEAH , IM THE ONE WHO WOULD NOT FALL DOWN FOR EARTHLY STUPIDNESS !! IM GOOD Yeah IM WELL ,, you are just blank in my past ,, , SORRY YOU CANT BE MY ONE !! GOOD BYE FOREVER,, YEAH IM GOOD !! ...